The Rat Packer.

I’ve talked about sports — and sports only — I think twice since this page’s inception back in September of 2007.  During the Stanley Cup playoffs last year I called Scott Hartnell a “bitch”; I also said I hoped the Flyers are out in 4 even though I “don’t like the Penguins at ALL”.  A year earlier I said the Stanley Cup would be the best championship, in terms of quality, since the 2000 Cup.  But that’s the extent of real-life sports talk around here.

Well, I’m from Minnesota.  And as indifferent I can be towards the NFL, its legions of dumb-fuck fans, ego-centric players, and totalitarian owners, I had to mention this story.

Last week during the Vikings win over a jealous ex-girlfriend-esque Green Bay Packers, a guy named Ryan Hinderaker (resident of Minneapolis who’s originally from the land of cheese) stabbed… yes, STABBED another man he followed out of a pizza joint where patrons where watching the game.  Hinderaker apparently started arguing with in the restaurant, even though the guy he picked was a Seahawks fan.  To avoid a potentially dangerous situation, the Seahawks fan left the establishment and was followed by Hinder-loser, sporting a Packers T-shirt.  He pulled out a small knife and shanked the man once in the stomach, fled.  Later he would call the MPD and confess.  A few casual observations here:

1. NFL fans are total dipshits.  Countless stories like this seem to come out each and every week.  There was that case where a RB’s yard, who’d fumbled that previous Sunday, was vandalized by FANS of the team (New England, I believe?).  I mean, I know at one time a fan fought Ty Domie in a penalty box, but NFL have got to take the cake as the most jackass-ish (not to mention the dumbest).
2. Whitest professional sports fans = Packer fans.  Seriously, is there a whiter fan base in the realm of professional sports than Green Bay Packer fans?  Blaze-orange hunting vests?  That awful “Go-Pack-Go!” chant?  The use of Todd Rundgren’s “Bang the Drum All Day” after TD’s?  I honestly don’t think so, not even in the NHL.
3. They’re so so bitter.  Self explanatory.

Unrelated, but Chris Chelios NEEDS to retire.  Now.  In a move of utter desperation, Chelios could be skating this Monday with the AHL’s Chicago Wolves.  Wow, dude.  I mean I know you think you complete lack of speed won’t be taken advantage of among AHL players, but trust me, it will.  You’ll be walked at least 3 or 4 times per game.  Bring it in, Chris.  For fuck’s sake.  You’re not Brett Favre.

Speaking of hockey, Luongo, David Booth, and Thomas Vanek aren’t pulling their weight on my fantasy team.  I’m giving it another month or so, then I’m dropping each to waivers if they don’t pick their shit up.

-Sonny